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A few weeks ago I wrote a post about the 5 words that changed my life– which were “do you take this woman”  followed 32 years later by  “the pathology is not good.”

In the two months since we found out that my wife has breast cancer we have made the trek to different  hospitals to see various doctors for a variety of procedures.

When an operation or test involves some sort of medication to relax my wife, they always ask me the same question- “Are you the responsible ADULT?”

I know or at least suspect that they are just making sure she has a ride home, but I find it funny to be asked this question repeatedly  because I never got into this relationship to be the responsible adult. In fact, many think I got married just so I would have some adult supervision in my life.

One thing this unexpected turn of events has taught us is that we need to be prepared to change. It looks like it is my turn to be the responsible adult and it my wife’s turn to accept help from others. This is a big change for both of us, and we endeavor to make our way through it.

Sometimes marriage is about letting the other be the responsible adult, even if giving up control is one of the scariest things life could ask of you.

Victor Frankel , one of my favorite authors, offers some wonderful advice when he says:

When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.

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